It's been longer than normal since I've posted here, which I'm sure no one is complaining about. I've had a lot of shit going down in my life lately, on top of classes, on top of relationship issues. . . . . .Shit's not been too good.

I've been having some minor drug issues lately this year, which I'm getting help for now. I'm going for an AODA assessment next week, during which I'll be able to talk to the counselor on camus who knows more about drugs and addictions and stuff. I'm really hoping right now that things can be done more my way than the way my counselor would suggest, because that's not going to work, I already know. She told me today that she would suggest quitting everything at once, instead of just focusing on the one drug. The problem is, I only want to quit this one, and not the others, so if we end up doing that I'm going to relapse so many times it won't even be worth it. So I'm kinda worried about that assessment next week, but hopefully things will work out.

On top of that, I'm having guy problems. I met this guy the first time my freshman year here, in IMPACT. He trained me for the postion I held last year before graduating and going to live in Germany for a year. Now he's back on campus as the nighttime hall director for the complex I live in. I've been hanging out with him a lot the last couple of weeks, and I started realizing that I'm kind of falling for him. He's only 4 years older than me, which isn't too terrible, especially when you consider that David was 6 years older than me. He's a very sweet guy too, and I've found it to be incredibly easy to talk to him about everything. He's the one who gt me in to make an appointment at the counseling center last week, and "forced" me to go without making me feel like it wasn't my choice. Anyway, the problem is that he is only temporary. They are right now looking for a replacement for our former hall director, and once they find one, both of them are gone. And I know, if I let myself realize how much I'm starting to like this guy, he's going to leave and I'm going to end up hurt. I mean, fuck, I helped him Sunday night to fill out some paperwork so he can get a job back in St. Louis again. I so don't want to fall for him, but I like him more every time we spend time together, which is often.

EDIT: It is official, a new hall director has been hired. I just found out tonight. I have one week, and no idea if I want to tell him anything or not. Fuck.
/EDIT

So those are my two biggest issues right now. I've been trying to get some more poetry written, but I keep running into blocks. Either my mood changes, or I just feel like I'm writing the same thing over and over and over again, and I don't want to be one of those poets. But I might get something done soon, and you'll all definately know when that happens.

Other than that, not too much to talk about right now. I'm off to eat my rice and find something to do for the rest of the night. Ciao!

yo.he.estado.aqui.muchas.veces.antes.y.regreso

Recent Submissions (Yes, I love them ):
Midnight's Interlude
Orbiting The Wasteland
False Idols and Warring Gods
Synthetic God
CandyLand
Interlude To Madness

OMFD (Oh My Fucking Davey) !!

so.selfish
this.day.should.last.forever



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